Catching Up 2

Out of the blue, a few days ago, I got a message from my gay ex-roomie. It had been so long since we had last seen each other, so he was looking to hang out and catch-up. Although I still think we don't have much in common, I agreed to meet him at a bar to check how he was doing.

I had a pretty good time tonight with him. The conversation flowed well and it's good to hear things are going well with him.

The inevitable topic of "meeting people" came up and he asked how I was doing on the dating scene. My response was that I pretty much had no real luck. He admitted that he had thought in advance about what my answer to this question would have been. He honestly wasn't surprised that I hadn't been meeting people or going out to bars. He didn't understand how I could be so friendly outgoing but not "stepping up to the plate" with strangers. I explained to him my awkward feelings in bars on my own and that I go out to have fun with friends, as opposed to meeting random people. He seemed genuinely concerned for me and my future.

Him: "Have you ever really thought about it? You have fooled around with so few gay guy - you can even count them on your fingers!"

He continued saying that if I kept like this I wasn't going to be meeting anyone ever.

Obviously, his honesty didn't make me feel too good about myself. I kind of just shrugged it off, with no real answer.

Me: "I don't know. It'll happen when it happens", was the best I could reply.

After about 2 hours, I decided it was time to leave. I kind of felt like I had nothing else to say anyway. I got the same feeling from him.

We decided we would hang out in 2 weeks - or more like that he would give me a call. I still think we have very little in common as friends, but I would be up for going out to a gay bar/club with him. As I've said before: going with friends is very different than going alone. I have lots of fun when I'm there with at least a friend.

Part of me thinks he wants to hangout now because he's coming close to breaking up with his long-term boyfriend, as he explained. He does have the habit of losing touch with/ditching people just because he's dating someone. Another part of me thinks he wants to hangout because he feels pity for me. He wants me to have the chance of meeting someone, especially since I met my last real boyfriend 1.5 years ago through him.

Thinking about our conversation now and with his perspective on my situation, I feel down on myself. Great, thanks ex-roomie...

Either way, if he does call me: yay. If he doesn't: whatever.