Poutinukkah

My friends and I celebrate a lesser-known holiday at this time of year. With the powerhouses of Christmas and New Years, it's all too easy to ignore this day. Many people might think I'm talking about Hanukkah, which is a common mistake. Although this holy day does owe its roots to the Jewish tradition, it's central meaning is derived from its blending with Québécois (a.k.a. Quebec - the greatest Canadian province ever) culture. This holiday I speak of is called Poutinukkah.


This great religious day owes its formation to the melting pot of traditional Jewish celebration and French-Canadian culinary delight, along with a dash of open-minded humour and alcohol. Poutinukkah is a day where friends come together, to light the traditional Poutinukkah menorah candles and celebrate the joys of life, while force-feeding themselves large amount of the holy poutine. An evening of revelry and good-times continues into the night, as friends make open bets upon what the future has in store for their friends. All is done in good/horrible taste.


In case you you are unfamiliar, poutine is a traditional Québécois dish, of french fried, gravy and cheese curds. Don't let this heart-attack-on-a-plate fool you: it is a gift from the French-speaking Poutinukkah Gods. While containing enough calories fit for 7 person, it emboddies the Québécois zest for indulgence and fun. Don't bash it till you try it.



Yesterday was no dissapointment to the Poutinukkah tradition. We had our token Jew say the Hebrew prayer, as the candles were lit and then we feasted. I had some good natured bets to declare. To make sure all statements are remembered, they must be written down and safely stored in the holy vessel, known as Future Dog. Once a year, on Poutinukkah, Future Dog can be reopened and the bets verified. But until that day, it remains in a safe location, away from those who might want to desecrate the holy relic.


Although this holiday has only existed for about 15 years, its regional celebration is sky-rocketing. I hope it will soon spread outside of Montreal and hopefully become a provincial holiday.

Look at those devout Poutinukkah followers - they are the pioneers.